


In which Karkat realizes he gives a fuck

by modifiedMelody



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Earth C, F/M, Fluff, Genderfluid Character, Genderfluid Egbert, M/M, Nightmares, Post SBURB, slowburn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-07-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:47:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25169431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/modifiedMelody/pseuds/modifiedMelody
Summary: Waking up in the arms of June Egbert wasn't exactly a bad thing, but when it comes to hiding your feelings from a god who can sense every hitch of your breath, it doesn't exactly help either.
Relationships: John Egbert/Karkat Vantas, John Egbert♦Dave Strider, June Egbert/Karkat Vantas, June Egbert♦️Dave Strider
Comments: 2
Kudos: 30





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> SO I wrote some fluff drabbles and it got OUT OF HAND

Karkat heard her coming-- June's footsteps were always light, like she was a whim away from flying if she decided to. As much as he cared for his stupid fucking roomate, he couldn't help but hope she was going to pass his room-- it was three in the fucking A.M.! He needed his beauty sleep for fucks sake. But of course, why would Karkat catch a break-- she doesn't knock, instead opening the door a crack, somehow looking  _ shy _ of all things. Apologetic is not a common look on June, it threw him off.

"Hey, my room is kind of cold, can I sleep in here?" June asked, standing in Karkat's door frame like a lost child. Karkat's first instinct was to tear into her, yell at her for waking him up, even though he was sitting there staring at the ceiling. Before she even finished speaking Karkat already had a fairly scathing retort prepared-- but it caught in his throat when he looked at her-- her eyes were puffy and red, as if she had been crying. Oh. He… really didn't like seeing that. Fixing everyones personal problems had become a bad habit of his when he was younger, but everything about her screamed at him to butt in and make everything better, somehow.

He wondered if she  _ knew _ he could see her, considering how she didn't do much to hide the tears. Humans didn't have the same kind of vision as trolls, apparently. Karkat realized he was baring his teeth, and forced himself to relax. Asking her what was wrong was out of the question-- she was a master of deflection and changing the subject on a dime. It irked Karkat to no end, never getting a straight answer, but fuck! He had no choice but to slow burn this fucker until she stopped being such a cagey douche about her problems.

"What are you, a wiggler? Do you have any fucking clue how long it takes me to get to sleep without a recupracoon in this godforsaken human hive? I was right at the edge of falling asleep when your dumbass waltzed in all fucking cold or whatever-- did you even bring a blanket? Oh, for the love of fuck, you're hopeless." He grumbled. He assumed June knew that was a yes, because she moved quickly to join him in bed. 

Ok, so it turned out Karkat didn't really think this through. June had never done this before, and Karkat was suddenly filled with Anxiety. She had always been touchy feely-- oh God would she want to snuggle? Karkat had no fucking clue how to go about that-- what would he even do? How does one perform physical interaction??? Fuck. 

June makes herself comfortable to his right, not even close enough to touch. She was just as tense, maybe even regretting her decision. If she did, she didn't mention it. 

Karkat sat up, startling her just a bit.

"I'm going to read. I can't fall asleep now anyways." He said, increasing the ire of his voice. June hummed some kind of apology, looking as if Karkat was actually mad at her. What the fuck? Karkat took some time to decide how he would bring it up and what he wanted to say, but June was already asleep, or pretending to be asleep to avoid confrontation.    
  
His book was heavy in his hands, and as he read he felt himself drifting into slumber.   
  
The next morning he woke up late and alone.

=>

As Karkat lumbered into the kitchen, he noticed food was already prepared. Fucking prospits and their terrifying affinity for good morning moods. The bags under his eyes were worse than usual as June-- no, John, he was wearing his He/Him pin today-- flew in. 

"Sleep well?" He beamed, the lilt of guilt evident. 

"As well as I fucking can with shitty little Egberts coming to me during ungodly hours of the day-- night-- to steal my comfort square," He griped, causing John to laugh. Well, at least he could do one thing right. His hair was in a low ponytail today, and Karkat couldn't help but give it an annoyed tug.

"If you're going to sleep with me don't wait until 3 a.m. to ask, bulge for brains. Unlike you, your godliness, I have shit I need to be awake for." He says between mouthfulls of whateverthefuck delicious pastry John made for breakfast. At this point he was pretty sure John's cooking was the only reason he dealt with such asinine bullshit from day to day. Also because John was one of his closest friends, but he didn't need to know that.

The heir frowned rather comically, making Karkat hold back a smirk. 

"I have stuff to do too! And it's not like trolls can't figure out repopulation on their own, humans did!" He mused-- Karkat and John had had this conversation before, many fucking times, and the entire point is always to piss Karkat off. He had to help Kanaya in the caverns, it was his job! He had responsibilities, unlike the carefree god of Wind floating across from where he stood. 

So they fought about it like they usually do, increasing John's gambit and easing some tension from Karkat's shoulders. It was nice to get all the yelling out before he had to deal with people who didn't understand what he meant by it. John always got it-- always saw through it, and let him get his frustrations out. It was nice, he hoped John had as much fun as him when they argued.

When Karkat got home, John was already asleep. It was kind of disappointing, in all honesty.

That is, until 2 a.m. rolled around. John was back. 

"What did I fucking tell you about waking me up in the middle of the night? You had every hour of the fucking day to fall asleep in here and you decide on the one that will cause me the most fucking bullshit!" He rants as John, who had already floated into the bed,

"You should be grateful I'm even letting you sleep in here! Do you know what it means for a troll to be comfortable sleeping around someone? Of course fucking not because you refuse to learn jack shit about my race-- you humans have your heads so far up your own asses that if you had to learn one god damn thing about anyone but yourselves it would leave your pans so fucking fried that youd forget how to tie your fucking strut pod holders!" Karkat ranted, and John listened. He probably didn't want to talk anyways-- he was in the same state as yesterday night. John probably appreciated Karkat ignoring his sniffles, but it was eating him up inside not asking. Maybe he could try to start the conversation, somehow.

"Also, why the fuck are you sleeping in here? You're the fucking god of breath and I have a feeling a breeze isn't the reason you're constantly up my fucking nook." He huffed. John started, taking a moment to realize Karkat was talking to him now. 

"Oh. I was just having trouble sleeping, it's easier when there's someone's breathing to listen to," He said, and that would actually be a good reason if John didn't add his 'I'm a dipshit who doesn't want to give a straight answer' laugh at the end. The overly cheerful, slightly bashful giggle of someone who's hiding shit. 

But of course, if Karkat pushed it John would just make up an even more elaborate excuse, leaving him more frustrated than before. Karkat decaptchalogued the book he was reading the night before, and John asked what it was,

"I'm not reading the title to you, i'm too fucking tired," He sighed, causing John to huff.

"Read it to me," John requested, shifting to lay facing Karkat. 

"No." He stated flatly, but of course, of fucking course, John does't relent. 

"Pleeeeeeeeaseeee! It'll help me sleep! And it'll teach me about quadrants and all of that troll romance stuff you always talk about!" He begged-- Karkat sighs a deep sigh, channeling all of the regret of his fucked up life into one rage filled exhale.

"Fine." he grited, and halfway through the first chapter John is asleep. Figures. He supposed the human would be pissy if he decided to read ahead, so he placed the book on his bedside table and let himself be lulled to sleep by John's steady breath. Huh, maybe that was a pretty good reason to share a bed after all. 

==>

During one of his weekly shit talking sessions with Dave, Rose and Kanaya, Rose pointed out that for the past week Karkat's eyes have been baggy and his fuse shorter than usual.

"Yeah, June keeps fucking sleeping with me," he grumbles-- Dave and Rose's eyebrows raise in unison, and they share a glance. His face is immediately red-- god he fucking hated humans. 

"Not like that, you gross fucking freaks. She just sleeps in my bed, for whatever fucking reason." He complained, hoping his anger blush is hiding his fluster blush.

"Oh, she's having nightmares." Dave deadpanned. Ah, so this was a normal human thing? Or at the very least a normal June thing. 

"And? Why does she come crying to me about it?" he hissed, crossing his arms. "You're her moirail, why doesn't she go to your hive?"

Dave rolled his eyes, and Rose watched the entire situation tentatively. Kanaya just looked confused. Ok, fine, stupid question. A walk down the hall is easier than flying across the city. From there the subject changed, but Karkat couldn't help but wonder what June could possibly be dreaming about. 

That night, June actually came into his room at a normal fucking time. She had gotten more comfortable with it, at least. But… now he knew why she didn't want to be alone. She was scared… and so she came to him. The realization made his pusher ache-- fuck. He wanted to comfort her more than ever now, as she settled herself beside him. It was  _ actually _ cold tonight, and Karkat couldn't think of a rebuttal as June wrapped her arms around him. She acted like it didn't bother her, but it was obvious she was nervous. She seemed so cozy, and relieved, it was adorable.

Hold up.

He had to backtrack a moment. His close friend was not  _ adorable _ . Where the fuck did that come from? He didn't think of anyone that way… what the fuck? Oh fuck, gog fuck, Karkat was blushing bright red now. He was a fool-- all of these redrom tropes, how could he not notice? He knew June would pick up on his breath catching-- she was a fucking breath player after all, but she didn't mention it. 

It took one paragraph for June to fall asleep snuggled against him, leaving him flustered and confused. How long had he… oh, now that he thought about it, quite a while. 

He didn't remember falling asleep last night, but he assumed must have since he woke up in June's arms, back pressed against her stomach. He didn't like how incredibly fucking comfy it was, nor the fact that he wouldn't mind staying here all day. 

But her body heat had left him sweating overnight, making his clothes tacky and uncomfortable. Last night's revelation didn't help him either, nor did his responsibilities for the day. Kanaya needed help finding a way to break up lusus fights, or something like that-- he couldn't make his pan function long enough to follow that train of thought though. *

Carefully, he lifted June's from his side, attempting not to wake up the sleeping heir. As he scooted away, two strong arms pulled him right back in.

"Five more minutes," she mumbled, snuggling her head deeper into Karkat's neck. Karkat had absolutely no fucking clue why he thought anything in his trainwreck of a life could be easy, but here we are. 

"June, I have to-"

"John." 

"Sorry, John, I have to help Kanaya today." He said, trying to escape again. John was very warm and incredibly comfy, and his covers we're so fucking soft… 

"Five more minutes…" John repeated, albeit a little more firmly. Karkat sighed,

"I have shit to do, y'know! I hate to tell you but I happen to have a job, and-- this ones gonna blow your windsock off-- ITS NOT CUDDLING WITH WIGGLER BRAINED SCAREDYBERTS BECAUSE THEY CAN'T SLEEP! Get some shut eye with your moirail or something, you've been up my waste chute all week and quite frankly I don't understand how you can stand spending so much time with me…" The rant continued, but Karkat made no move to leave the bed, and he was pretty sure John was already asleep again. His words did not stop, however, and he ended up waking John up a few minutes later during a particularly loud point. John rose up, smiling at Karkat.

"Were you seriously yelling to yourself that whole five minutes?" He asked. Karkat was red again, angry, embarrassed, whatever-- he knew his cheeks were warm. 

"Fuck you." He sighed, all out of words for now. 

"Fuck me yourself, coward," he snickered, already out of bed.

" _ IM  _ THE COWARD?" 

"Exactly! I'm glad we're seeing eye to eye," he hums, the omen of destruction that was an Egbert smirk growing across his face, "er, eye to chest." 

And with that jab he'd flown away. 

Karkat was boiling by now, that little shit was going  _ down. _


	2. Killer Instincts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> June/John and Karkat get into a small tussle uwu

John didn't get far, meaning he  _ definitely  _ wanted a fight. He saw the rogue egbert in their living room, seemingly looking for somewhere to hide-- as if he couldn't become the fucking wind at will.

Karkat's eyes narrowed, he knew his prey was distracted. His instincts told him to sink onto his haunches, and he followed what they dictated. For the first time in a long time, Karkat felt like the killing machine he was bred to be. Teeth bared, Karkat pounced, heart set on tackling John to the ground. 

All he caught was a claw full of air and a face full of wall.

He heard his neck crack from the force of swinging around to look for John once more, who was currently trying to see if Karkat was actually hurt so he knew if he was allowed to laugh or not.

Karkat spent a solid 5 minutes after that desperately trying to catch John, only to be met with nimble dodging and bullshit powers that were  _ definitely _ not fair to use in a fight. 

As trying to catch the wind itself tends to go, it didn't take long before he had completely run out of breath and collapsed on the couch. His killer instincts were  _ not  _ what they used to be.

"I know where you sleep." He hissed, only wheezing a little. Ok, he was kind of out of shape, so what? It's not like there was anyone out there attacking him anymore. 

John, as if reading his thoughts, corrected his statement by promptly attacking him via sitting squarely on Karkat's back, filling him with fresh, boiling annoyance. 

"GET YOU'RE STUPID ASS OFF OF ME YOU HORNSUCKING SHITGUZZLING SACK OF FUCK" His words were basically exploding out of him, and John  _ giggled _ . UGH. He tried to shift, but the Egbert currently residing on his back made that task just about impossible. 

"You can be a real asshole when you want to be y'know." Karkat grumbles, feeling every happy go lucky giggle that bounces out of John's stupid fucking air tubes. John made a show of waiting for Karkat to calm down-- it seemed he could only ever be patient when it had to do with his fucking gambit. This was _not_ fair. Karkat was hoping, in some desperate corner of his mind, that this tussle would leave him pinned against a wall under a worked up John. But noooo, wrestling that ends up like _that_ only happened before Karkat even realized he liked him and he could APPRECIATE those hammer arms. 

Karkat considered just staying there all day, slowly being crushed to death via Egbert ass. When he thought about it, it wasn't really that bad of a way to go anyways, maybe he could just die right here and get out of his stupid honorary jade duties. Half of this was yelled out loud, but he couldn't remember which half, and frankly he didn't care.

Karkat ran out of things to yell at John, so the god got bored and escaped to the kitchen. Chasing him was pointless, Karkat decided as he sat up and popped his back. Ugh, he didn't want to go to work today, but Kanaya said she really needed his help. So, he forced himseld up and left John to do whatever the hell he was up to while he got ready.

Being friends with people  _ sucked,  _ he told himself, while wondering how he could surprise Kanaya with his fashion choices-- she never said he was a disaster outloud, but he could see it in her eyes... he was a mess.

Apparently, John had been making breakfast while Karkat was gone, which was fantastic considering the fact that Karkat had completely forgotten and was just going to go in hungry. John was still in his pajamas, but that wasn't incredibly out of the ordinary for him. He eyed the troll's tight-fitting turtleneck, which Karkat had chosen because Kanaya got it for him, meaning it must be at least a little fashionable. He couldn't help but be a little proud that it drew John's eye.

He thanked him for the meal, flipped him off for whatever stupid things he was going to do while he was away, and left. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will probs be pov June ;0


End file.
